Gary Seymour, sports@wolfrivermedia.com
Not that the Green Bay Packers’ season is approaching a point of no return or anything like that, but if it ever does, there’s comfort in knowing that Joe Thomas Sr. is available.
On the other hand, he’s playing offense now.
A once-hopeful campaign is rapidly spiraling into a punch line for one of the preseason Super Bowl favorites, although in defense of the Packers … wait, that’s right, there is no defense. The nationally televised 42-24 walloping administered by Washington last week was as dispiriting a setback as they come.
In losing their fourth straight – a stretch during which the Packers have given up an average of more than 38 points a game – the unpleasant truth is that we can almost stick a fork in 2016. The little red button on this turkey is ready to pop up.
The Packers can barely stop the run, and their injury-depleted secondary is now about as deep as breath steam on a mirror. Washington’s repeated long bombs burned them with such nauseating regularity that last Sunday’s embarrassment resembled a kids’ backyard game where neither team ever stops the other and the winner is determined by what time you get called in for dinner.
Washington punted with a little more than 9 minutes left in the half, and then scored on its next six possessions.
“The last four weeks have not gone the way we’ve liked,” Packers coach Mike McCarthy said. “We just didn’t play well enough.”
That’s a big 10-4, coach.
Not in the last 63 years have the Packers allowed 30 or more points in four consecutive games. When you read that Washington rolled up 515 yards of offense, the first reaction may have been, “Was that all?”
Whenever the hosts needed a first down, they got it. Whenever the Packers made a comeback run – which they did often, in one of their better offensive performances of late – Washington came back and instantly retook the momentum.
So confident were they that the plays would unfold as drawn up that Washington went for a fourth-and-1 on its own 40-yard line with about 6 minutes left in the game and the score 29-24. Normally not a great move, percentage-wise, but this was not a normal night. Quarterback Kirk Cousins made the first down on a sneak and two plays later Washington had another touchdown. It’s hard to prevail when your defense is taking win, place and show in the matador lookalike contest.
Of course, you never say never because you never know, but a cursory peek at the remaining games on the schedule today evokes a sense of wonder about which teams – Philadelphia, Houston, Seattle, Chicago, Minnesota and Detroit – the Packers might have a remote shot of beating. The Bears are still pretty user-friendly, but beyond that there isn’t a great reason to expect the Packers to avoid their first sub-.500 season since 2008.
The aforementioned Thomas, who is the father of Packers linebacker Joe Thomas Jr., made news last week in becoming what is believed to be the first 55-year-old to play in a Division I football game. A defensive lineman and running back in high school, he fulfilled his lifelong wish to play in a college game. Suited up for South Carolina State in a win over Savannah State, the hearty geezer ran for minus-1 yard on four carries, coincidentally matching the total of rushing touchdowns achieved by Packers running backs this year (zero).
On the bright side for the Packers, if there is a bright side, the pressure is off. Off the fans, anyway. Lowered expectations equals less heartache.
McCarthy, who is under contract through 2018, said his team’s backsides are against the wall.
Against the wall? More like chain-tied, ball-gagged and submerged in a locked safe at the bottom of Lake Michigan. Work their way out of this mess and they’ll have made Houdini look like a Cub Scout.